In the Wilderness, I feel at home. There are no questions. No thoughts. No distractions. There is nothing to debate. Nothing to ponder. Everything is as it is. Life is perfect.
While at home I tend to feel lost. Who am I? What am I supposed to be doing in this life? Bills. Deadlines. Music. Toys. Gadgets. The house needs to be tidy. Things to put away. Things to clean. Organize. What is all of this? 19 bowls to eat from. 15 glasses to drink from. What would I like to eat? Full fridge. Full pantry. Yet nothing comes to mind. No. Nothing to eat here. Better to go out. Spend some money. Support the economy. Drink some alcohol. Feel better. Forget about all the stuff, and the bills that comes with it.
I go out. Spend some money. Feel better. Wake up the next day. Deadlines. Schedules. Bills. Need a new toy to get all of this off my mind. MIND. That’s the word. That’s the very little word. At home, I live inside my mind.
Out in the wilderness, I am living with God. As God. Among God. Spirit. Magic. All around me. A sleeping bag. A coffee mug. A plastic bowl. Simple foods. And everything in the world money can’t buy.
~ Scott Stillman